The small city of Mount Gambier, located in the picturesque South Eastern region of South Australia boasts some of the state's most amazing natural wonders. Of these, the most famous is the breathtaking Blue Lake; the only of its kind in the world.
The Geology of the Site
The land surrounding Mount Gambier is densely rich in limestone, due to the remnant of a shallow sea which lay over the region millions of years ago. The limestone, made up from fossils of fish and coral, forms a crust under the earth which extends for over two hundred kilometres and reaches a maximum depth at three hundred metres at Port MacDonnell, a small fishing town nearby. Over the years, this abundance of limestone has gradually been worn away by the ever flowing water table and has created an immense system of caves and underground caverns, providing a beautiful sight for divers.
The History of the Blue Lake
Mount Gambier's Blue Lake is actually situated in a dormant volcano crater and lies over fifty metres below ground level. Here, the crystal clear water found in the numerous underground caves is exposed, as it flows slowly through the layers of limestone under the city. The lake is made found by the remarkable colour changes it undergoes throughout the year. The summer months are the most spectacular, with the lake turning almost a fluorescent aquamarine. Following this, it starts to change back and maintains a steely grey colour during the winter.
Why The Lake Changes Colous
Many crazy theories abound as to why the Blue is the colour it is; the most common being that certain molecules in the water reflect the sunshine differently at certain times of the year. However, according to the information provided by Mount Gambier Tourism Centre, the natural colour of the water is blue. By why then, does the colour change in the winter? The simplest explanation is the increase in rainfall causes a disturbance in the delicate balance between the layers which create such a blue colour. Hence in winter, the position of the top layer of algae, largest responsible for the aquamarine colour, becomes altered and the clarity of the water becomes decreased.
The Blue Lake: A Tourist Attraction
The Blue Lake is the single biggest tourist attraction in the city, with thousands of people travelling from all over the world during the summer months to catch a glimpse of the azure colour. There is a road which wind its way around the lake, with several look outs positioned along the way to allow you to stop and take in the view. However, if time is on your side there is also a footpath which surrounds the perimeter and is favourite walk for locals and tourists alike. The circumference of the lake is just over three kilometres and provides a leisurely one hour walk where the lake can be viewed from all perspectives. There is a variety of accommodation available for tourists metres from the lake and a quaint coffee ship which also offers guided tours right down to the surface of the lake.
So I continue to plough on through the ridiculous amount of blog entries I still have to do about the beautiful Land of the Long White Cloud and thought starting at the top and working my way down would make sense. Cape Reinga is recognised as the northern-most tip of New Zealand and is so much more than just a rocky and windy outcrop that protrudes out into the Pacific Ocean (although of course it is also that).
Cape Reinga is the top of the region referred to as "Northland" which encompasses pretty much anything north of Auckland. It has extreme cultural significance to the Maori people of New Zealand, making it more than just another piece of rock to stare at.
Getting There
As with every spot on the New Zealand "places to see" map, Cape Reinga is a little hard to get to. The roads in New Zealand are so unbelievably windy they have been said to have even set seasoned sailors stomachs on edge. Cape Reinga is also very isolated so it is important to come prepared; if you get stuck in a situation it will be a good few hours until assistance can arrive. However, being such a popular tourist destination, the roads are well maintained, albeit very windy. We headed up from Mangonui and from there you can follow the clearly marked signs all the way to the top. Allow at least two and a half hours to reach the Cape (more if you are in a caravan or camper) and if you are in this latter category be prepared to cop some flack from impatient car drivers as there are little places to overtake with such tight corners and cliff like precipices.
Along The Way
Despite there being a lack of amenities along the way, there is no shortage of incredible natural scenery. Of course there are the quintessential rolling green hills dotted with sheep aplenty, but there are some special spots along the way that are worth pulling over. Along the main highway there are several points where you can turn off west to the nearby coast and spot New Zealand's famous 90 mile beach. Be careful swimming as none of the strip is monitored by lifeguards and be careful taking your car onto the sand if you don't want it to become bogged and up to its mirrors in sea water by high tide. About 45 minutes from the Cape is Te Paki sand dunes, the most immense sand dunes I have ever seen. They are located very close to the main highway but again be careful taking your caravan or camper as the road is unsealed and quite steep. Sandboards are available for hire and dragging it up and down the enormous hills are sure to keep those extra kgs from the NZ fish and chips at bay.
The Cape
Once arriving at Cape Reinga, the area is set up well for tourists. Avoid the main lower carpark as it is usually chock full of tourist buses. Head instead to the smaller one up the hill, it is a little further to walk, but again those fish and chips won't work themselves off. There are a couple of rules the Maori people of this land ask you to abide by including no eating on the site and no littering. It is important to not insult the cultural importance of such a place - culture is part of the strong identity of New Zealanders and is something that must be carefully observed if you are a visitor to their lands. Starting the walk to Cape, you follow a well constructed path down the cliff and then up again to the very last peninsula. Along the way are plaques and memorials to acknowledge and inform visitors about the traditions and legends of these lands. At the very end of the Cape sits the famous Cape Reinga lighthouse, a sturdy structure that has battled the gale force sea winds for many a decade. It is now of course automatically operated but is a nod to the Pakeha, (or "white" people of New Zealand" and how they have made their contribution to this historical place.
Did the cultural significance of the area really sink in for me?
DEFINITELY
Did I think I was going to be blown off into the ocean and end up in Tonga?
MAYBE
Will I forget standing out and seeing the Tasman and Pacific Oceans crashing into each other as far as the eye can see?
PROBABLY NOT!
Ever wanted to throw yourself off a bridge with a rubber band tied around your ankles? To the old untravelled Sarah that would have been a worse fate than poking my own eye out with a red hot needle or listening to back to back Bieber for 24 hours straight. But the new "the world is my oyster" Sarah decided bungy jumping in New Zealand would be the best way to start 2013 and leap off into the unknown of what was to come (pun 100% intended)
So are you on the" to bungy" or "to-not bungy" precipice? It is a common resting place for those deciding whether to sign up for it, as well as those standing on the edge deciding whether to risk their lives by hurling themselves into nothing but air. To try and help you make an informed decision, here is a look at the pros and cons of bungy.
CONS
1. It is expensive.
Unfortunately I thought it would only be in some odd alternate universe where YOU had to pay $200.00 for the privilege of being able to leap from great heights with only a cord to ensure your safety, but sadly not; it is reality. Yes, I understand that a lot of the money goes towards the maintenance of the equipment (which you definitely want) and the training of the bungy staff (which again you definitely want) but it is indeed a hefty price tag. It is important to remember that this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and that also contributes to the price. Alongside the cost of the jump, there may be additional costs for photos or video footage, so keep this in mind. Also - most bungy operators do not offer refunds for "sorry I changed my mind and am peeing my pants I'm so terrified". However, this does serve as a good incentive to make the leap.
2. It hurts. A little.
Ok so some people may disagree with me on this but I think it is important to point out the possible (albeit slight) injuries that can be sustained. Most people who are hesitant about bungy are worried about the jolt and the bottom. In my experience, this was not actually as bad as I expected - the cord starts to pull you gradually so the shock to your body, and your mind, is not incredibly sudden. However, as your body has completely inverted in a matter of half a second, that is a lot of blood to rush to your head. My head was pounding for the rest of the afternoon after the jump and I'm not sure whether to attribute to this the action of the jump itself or the adrenaline doing mental things to my body. Either way it is not overly pleasant but you feel so stoked that you did it that you almost don't really care.
PROS
1. The operation is very well run
My experience with AJ Hackett Bungy was exemplary. Their staff have to undergone a hugely rigorous training regime before they are allowed to start letting people fly free and they have the best in safety equipment. The process is streamlined and safe and there are plenty of staff to help you every step of the way. Apart from the logistics of the jump itself, their videography and photography team is excellent. They capture your bungy on film and in motion and although it is a tad expensive to purchase at the end, the quality is (almost) worth the price. It is made very people friendly and easy to use, which is good - leaving you to concentrate on the main reason you are there; to jump into oblivion!
2. The feeling afterwards
Ok so this is going to sound lame, but I cannot describe how you feel after bungying for the first time. I went tandem with my boyfriend and although I clung to him like a limpet and burst a lung screaming so much, I couldn't have been more proud of myself when I finished. It is an amazing feat and not something that everyone can say they have done. Yes the bragging rights are worth it alone, but more importantly it is the feeling of accomplishment that you get from conquering your brain who was telling you the whole time that you were mental.
So there you have it - bungy is not for everyone but it was for me. Would I do it again? I'm not sure. Not just because it is expensive, and there are only a few places in the world that you can do it safely. But perhaps because I'd like to keep it sacred and have it as the one and only time in my life that I felt what it was like to fly.
Would I recommend the Kawarau Bridge bungy in Queenstown, New Zealand?
Definitely
Would I be brave enough to work up the courage to do it again?
Maybe
Will I ever get over my AWFUL facial expressions pulled in the midst of complete terror, captured for all eternity on film?
Probably Not!
When you travel the 36km tourist ride around the Whangarei Heads, they neglect to tell you the real impact of the gasp-affecting veiws that you will experience along the way. But there are also a few other things they don't tell you....
Firstly, the roads are windy and hilly and promise to make you feeel like you wanna chuck if you are that way inclined when it comes to long car rides. The roads often double back right on themselves or you reach the crests of hills without getting any view of what might be on the other side. They are often perched precariously on the hillsides and the spectactular views are often accompanied with the possibility of death by falling from the steep cliffs.
Secondly, each tiny bay of the Whangarei Heads is littered with little (and some not little) holiday houses that are probably worth millions of dollars but have been passed through their family's generations for years. Northland is a very popular spot for holidaying New Zealanders in the summer months and the quaint beach houses (or bach's as they are known to the Kiwis) dot each bay, each boasting a better view the further you drive around.
The best way to the tackle the Whangarei Heads is to make the journey through Paura Bay, Macleods Bay, Urqhuarts Bay and then down to Ocean Beach. The beach is beautiful and with reasonably surf conditions, it makes a great practicing ground for surfers of any skill. Please note though: don't lose your car keys in the sand like one poor guy did.... there is not a lot mechanic facilities around that way and an awful lot of sand to sift through!!! There are toilet facilities at the beach which is handy and a large carpark with room for caravan and bigger vans. Before you decide to camp there, check first - you do not want a large Maori police officer shining a torch into your window in the middle of the night!
This part of the Heads in shadowed under the great Mt Manaia, a steep cliff with a funny jagged top that looms over everything in the area. Apparently you can climb it, but after learning of a family friend who had tragically fallen to his death from there, and that it is a uphill climb for an hour and a half, we decided against it. To be honest, it was probably more because of the workout... I mean c'mon I am on holidays!
In terms of places to grab a drink or a nibble I would defintely recommend The Deck Cafe in Macleods Bay. The small cafe has a perfect view over the turquoise bay and offers indoor and deck dining, accommodating for all needs. The homemade pies are huge with loads of flaky pastry and come in a variety of flavours. They also offer the best in New Zealand ice cream, which I think is some of the best in world, and even though you know the extra cream in it will go straight to your hips, you really couldn't give a crap and eat it anyway.
If you are heading to the Whangarei Heads I would allow a good couple of hours to get to all of the little bays and beaches and have something to eat along the way.
Does the Whangarei Heads offer some of the best views in the North Island?
Definitely
Will I say this until I see some of the other amazing sites in the North Island?
Maybe
Will I remember that picturesque afternoon slowly gliding our way around the bays?
Probably Not!
So just before I leave this dusty red landmass of mine, I thought I'd write a little something about the outback and its many sides. There is the happy "I saw a Kangaroo" side and then the not so happy "I think I just saw the guy from Wolf Creek" side. Despite their differences, all of the sides of the outback should be appreciated and the best way to do that is get out there!
The Australian outback is one of the world's most desolate yet beautiful wonder's and has become the traditional backdrop to life in Australia through the eyes of the rest of the world. Taking time to travel through the outback when visiting Australia is a must, but its magnificent views and landmarks hide a treacherous world that can be fraught with danger for the unknowing and unprepared traveller. So here I've listed the top 5 things to keep in mind the next time you pack your car and tackle the Australian outback.
Photo courtesy of outpoll.com
1. It is big. And I mean REALLY big.
A large portion of Australia's landmass is classed as rural outback and whilst a lot of the land is used for farming and mining, there is also a whole lot of nothing. There are many ways a traveller can tackle the outback but perhaps the two most popular are the Adelaide to Darwin and Adelaide to Perth route. The first is a vertical route straight through the dusty heart of the country and in its entirety stretches for over 3000km. The second is across the completely barren Nullabor plain and is slightly shorter at 2,550km. Both routes have their own scenic advantages but their immense distance cannot be underestimated, even by Australian standards, a road trip through the outback is a big endeavour.
2. Allow enough time
Due to the distance, many tourists are unaware of exactly how long it can take to do either of the main outback routes. Having taken two weeks return to do that Adelaide to Darwin route myself, I can vouch for how much of a feat it is. Even if you are stretched for time try not to commit yourself to more than 5 or 6 hours of driving each day. Any more and you will get tired which could impend on your driving skills and you will end up missing most of the scenery that you drove into the outback to see in the first place. If you are wanting to stop at the tourist sites along the way (and you will need at least a full day at Ayres Rock) allow for at least 4 days to get to Darwin. Keep in mind that a lot of the top tourist spots are also quite a bit off the main highway, and these apparent "short" detours can eat into your travelling time and put you behind if you find yourself on a deadline. Moral is: try to have a flexible schedule if possible.
3. Watch out for wildlife
Because 90% of the outback is so sparsely populated, a large amount of native wildlife roam around after being pushed out of the more heavily populated coastal regions. It is not uncommon to come across a gathering of kangaroos, camels, emus or dingoes on the side of the road - or in fact on the road itself. Luckily, due to the lack of roadside trees or buildings it is fairly easy to spot one coming along the flat horizon. If you come across an animal, or animals, blocking the road don't panic. The best thing to do is wait for them to move, or try to go off the road a little to avoid them (be careful if you are not in a 4WD enabled car as this could cause some bogging issues!). If you must, a short beep of the horn will normally be enough to move them on, but you will see how nonchalant they are about being in the way; remember you are invading on their territory.
4. Pack spare everything
If you forget something on your outback road trip there is no supermarket that you can just pop down to so it is very important to pack smart. There will be a petrol station in every major (and minor) town along the way but if you take a little detour off the main highway you may find that when you get back on it again, you will run out of petrol before you reach the next town. So always carry a spare petrol tank and keep it full. Same goes for water and oil and anything else you might need for your vehicle. It is also a good idea to pack a cooler bag to keep any food items cool, as even in the winter it can reach mid 30's during the day, which could very quickly spoil your milk and your trip if you are not careful. Despite the often hot temperatures during the day, the nights in the desert are freezing so pack a range of clothes and be prepared to be constantly changing!
5. Appreciate the outback for what it is
The outback is not supposed to be a luxury road trip. There is nowhere you can stop to have a mud spa or your nails done, in fact there are barely any places to stop to buy bread and water. There is not a lot of phone or television reception but it is the perfect chance to escape the rat race and just be one with the landscape. You could go a whole day without meeting a single soul and hours and hours without passing any other cars. But it is the isolation of the outback that has thousands of international tourists spellbound every single year. The scenery is so untouched and with the native flora and fauna right outside your tent, there is no need to go hunting for the best outback experience: it will come to you.
For more information on planning your next Australian outback adventure visit http://www.outbacknow.com.au/
Was my Outback Roadtrip an eye opener to the isolation of Central Australia?
Definitely
Should we maybe have packed more essentials and less boxes of shapes (1 for every day)
Maybe
Will I ever forget when we had to sleep in the car in a creek bed or have a huge dingo sit a metre away from our camp fire licking his lips?
Probably Not!
I've entered the 2012 Expedia Travel Blogger Search and would love for you to vote for me? Enjoyed what you have read so far? Vote! You can also head to my profile and watch the crazy video I made (but keep in mind my skill is writing not multimedia!)
It is just over a month until I am set to leave this glorious country for another that lies most dearly in my heart. It is the home of the Hobbits, a lot of sheep and plenty of place names that are unpronounceable by 99% of tourists. The Land of the Long White Cloud, New Zealand.
Tagging along with me, for his very first trip overseas is my boyfriend who, despite being excused for his lack of travel experience, has been learning a few lessons about travelling overseas with Sarah.
In case any of you ever plan to voyage around the world with me in search of its many wonders, here is a list of things NOT to do before we go (almost all of which my boyfriend has done)
Book all accommodation, car rental and flights the night before.
Although it pains me to say so, I am not the world's best spontaneous traveller. I don't like saying it because I feel that as soon as the words are uttered from my lips the "travellers secret society" will cast me from their circle for being the person who wants to have a roof over their head and isn't really ok about sleeping at the airport to wait for an available flight. A lot of travellers I know are incredibly spontaneous and have amazing stories of where their unorganised-ness has led them. But they also have spent good portions of their trips sleeping in public toilets and wandering the streets at night amongst local mafia and petty burglars. I say that makes us pretty even. I'm not super fussy about what flight I take, what car we get or where we stay but I like to know that we have SOMETHING booked so I feel calmer about being in a foreign place and can begin to enjoy the experience more.
2. Go to the airport "when we feel like it"
In my eyes, this is the most cardinal of travelling sins. The departures terminal of any airport is my most favourite place. It is full of people with their bags packed off to visit family, their school mate or an oranguatan sanctuary but they all have something in common because they are HAPPY. People that are stuck back at the check-in desks crying because they were late for their flight and it has now closed, NOT SO HAPPY. Because I have travelled from a very young age, my mother has drilled into me that you must be at the airport 3 hours before your flight and, to the best of my ability, that is a rule I have tried to adhere to. I don't mind the waiting. I like being surrounded by the collective excitement at the Departure Gates and because of this, can't bring myself to feel sorry for those poor sods who get their names called out over the intercom.
"Paging David Smith on Flight LK89 to Bangaldesh, your aircraft is now ready for departure and all passengers are waiting on you".
I mean nobody wants to be THAT guy.
3. "Figure" it out when we get there
Lonely Planet was invented for travellers just like me. Yes there are those who like to go off the beaten track in search of the world's unknown but in this day and age of travelling there aren't many of those places left, and half of them have 200 page travel guides, already written by the lovely people at Lonely Planet. The key to a great trip is the amount of research you are willing to put in. Have you talked with your colleague at work who recommends that great pizza place in Queenstown? Or that boutique clothes store in a laneway off from the Pantheon in Rome that your neighbour told you about? With the wealth of information available to us, thanks to the Internet, there is no excuse to not take the experiences of others and use them wisely to create your own incredible journey. Now if only those little blue books didn't weigh so much, I'd have one for every town and city...
So in a nutshell that is the three NOT's to do when planning a trip with Sarah. Yes it can be a little hectic before you have even left, and yes I am anal about being organised but I am yet to have a complete travel disaster (fingers and toes crossed) and hope that my habits will ensure I never have one.
Will I be at that airport exactly 3 hours early when we head to NZ?
Definitely
Should I consider buying shares in Lonely Planet to at least get some financial benefit from my guidebook obsession?
And so we meet again. I've decided the travel inspiration in my head needs to be let loose again and as such am officially reviving this blog from the dead. Yes I'm not on my student exchange any more and yes I don't like to be reminded of those better times. But although my life goes on somewhat more boring than before, and I edge into "grown up life" where the most sought after thing is a stable job and a family dog, I still have the travel bug burrowing inside of me.
To keep you updated, since I've returned from England I've been to visit family in New Zealand and spent two weeks in Bali with a girlfriend celebrating our graduation from University and our inevitable entry in the aforementioned "grown up life". Both trips were enough to satiate my appetite, and Bali especially opened my eyes to a whole new corner of the world I hope to explore more of later on.
But with the Bali trip finishing over a year ago, the monotony of life has seeped into my body and the adventurous and passionate spirit in me has been a little squished.
So this post is to announce the blog is back on! I am looking to actively pursue my travel writing and hope to get my foot in the door with a few publications - nothing good in life is achieved by sitting on your ass. Yes I am proud of finishing my degree and getting my first job as a fresh graduate and yes it is good to have money (well the modest amount that graduates get paid anyway), but sometimes all of that seems less important in the face of a life lived without as much travelling as possible crammed into it.
So with an impending trip to New Zealand approaching with my family and my boyfriend, this is the new start of Definitely, Maybe, Probably Not, and the reignition of my drive and passion to write about the world and all its gloriousness.
Am I now more motivated than ever to make a life out of my most treasured love?
DEFINITELY
Will the journey be fraught with obstacles against the pushing tide of everyday life?
MAYBE
Will I let this discourage me as it has discouraged others before me?
PROBABLY NOT
I dont know whether you are technically allowed to write an entry in a travel blog when you cease to be travelling but I guess I write this blog so I make the rules. Unfortunately, writing this from sunny Australia does mean that my time in Europe is over, and this is the last entry from a girl saddened by her inevitable return.
Of course there were other places I visited that don't get a look in through the blog, specifically those at the very end of the trip where my life was in a suitcase and the possibilities of discoveries appeared endless. But having returned to Adelaide and back to the glaringly obvious 'real world', it gets harder and harder to reform those amazing memories onto the page. Or rather the screen.
But in case you were kept completely out of the loop here is a small recap of my time in my last few destinations: Italy, Spain and France.
1) Despite thinking I was going to spend my Italy trip a lonesome loner (and that is the worst kind of loner), I met Kat and Soph, two true blue Aussie girls out there in the Italianness doing what we Australians all do best; exploring things we are yet to see. Between the three of us we had so many crazy adventures, amazing pictures and unforgettable memories. There is nothing like a couple of aussie accents alongside of you to make it all seem so much easier.
2) Italian Diet for all 15 days I was there. Crossiant and Coffee. Coffee. Pizza. Gelati. Pasta. Rinse and Repeat.
3) Spending time in Spain with Andrea whom I had not seen in five years. But had not changed a single iota. Laughing at her being the only English speaker amongst her Spanish friends and the only Spanish speaker amongst her English friends. Now she truly knows what it means to be a human translating machine. I think I did actually see her head spin...
4) Tasting the best of Barcelona after a authentic, live Flamenco show with Myf and Cait Doughty. Dancing, Paella, Tapas, Crema Catalan and jugs and jugs of Sangria... there is no better combination.
5) Nearly dying in the plane ride from hell from Barcelona to Leeds. Thanks goes out to Bec Riggs for attempting to keep my calm. Sorry about your hand, hopefully it will heal soon and you will regain full use of your fingers.
6) Paris with my very very dear friend Lou Victorsen. Who constantly ceases to amaze me with her ability to be an amazing friend and yet STILL have no idea when it comes to directions. What are you going to do now that I am gone? Special note has to be eating Nutella crepes on the TOP of Eiffel Tower, and devouring strawberries and taking toooooo many self portraits UNDER the Eiffel Tower. Perfect Day.
7) Spending the last days in Leeds with all the people that made my trip so great - Jo, Fran and Tom, Tori, Bec and Alice, Anita, Ria and of course Louise. Burgers will never be the same again unless I can have one from the Library. And I don't mean the place with all the books people.
So that's it. A very quick look at the last couple of weeks of a 6 month trip that went by in the blink of an eye. Thank you to everyone who read the blog and supported this new endevour of mine. As the blog nears towards 2,000 hits, I have to share my appreciation for everyone who has helped that become possible.
And to anyone out there in cyber land who wants to do a overseas trip.
Do it.
Not tomorrow.
Not next Tuesday.
Not next year.
Now.
That's all the advice I can give.
Was this a trip of a lifetime?
DEFINITELY
Do I still wanna up and leave now and go back?
MAYBE
Is this the end of my global wanderings?
DEFINITELY NOT!
We are all familiar with the biblical tale of Moses. He climbs to the top of Mount Sinai and receives the Holy Ten Commandments from God, which are intended to help his people lead pure and fulfilling lives. We all know them: Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery, Thou Shalt Obey Mother and Father, Thou Shalt Always Eat The Crusts of Sandwiches Lest They Get Curly Hair.
But the Maltese must have all been in their siesta when Moses trotted to the top of that famous mountain and God came out of the clouds in all his puffy Holiness.
Because Malta has a very different set of Commandments…(featuring in descending order of course)
#10 Thou Shalt Have Plentiful Amounts of Stray Cats
I have never such a feline phenomenon as there was in Malta. It was like a water balloon of Cats exploded over the country and they all fell around the island. Ok that is not a great example because Cats HATE water but you get the general idea. The first few times I saw them, it was a little strange but I soon learnt that the only person staring incredulously was me, and that perhaps I was missing something. On the boardwalk along St Julian’s Bay lives dozens, all strolling around or lying in the sun with no worries in the world except where their next mouse will come from. Being a cat woman myself (pun intended) I loved it, so many pretty kitties to swoon over. Many of whom sat with me for hours and hours as I read, patted them and considered whether being an old spinster cat lady would really be SUCH a bad thing… At least they don’t hog the remote and leave the toilet seat up…
#9 Thou Shalt All Have Some (if only miniscule) Relationship to Australia
From what I discovered, the Maltese love Australia. They don’t know a WHOLE lot about it
(OLD MAN: ‘Where are you from?’
ME: Australia
OLD MAN: Ah! Australia! Sydney or Melbourne?
ME: Um well neither…. )
But their enthusiasm towards our great country is nonetheless impressive. Everyone I talked to had a mother, brother, auntie’s uncle’s yellow canary that immigrated to Australia and ‘very much likes it there’ (unsure how the canary would have communicated this). Triple points goes to the little Maltese man who tried to show his deepest condolences for my country with its ‘very bad water problems…’
#8 Thou Shalt Celebrate Cocktail Hour At Any Time
Along with the amazing Maltese sun, cocktails (along with gelati) were the other thing which ensured my position in a bliss induced coma the whole trip. There is no good time for cocktails in Malta.
Day One I had a cocktail with my afternoon brunch at 3:00pm.
The next day with my lunch at 12:30pm.
And then finally the last day as an accompaniment to my morning reading session at 11:00am.
Was there a judgemental or even remotely surprised face in the building? No siree.
NB: and on that note, nobody thought it was strange to have tiramisu gelati at 9:30am either.
Bless these people.
#7 Thou Shalt Provide An Efficient and Helpful Sightseeing Service
The Malta Sightseeing Tour was amazing. The ticket was valid for the whole day, and unlike other sightseeing tours which just take you around the city, this tour took you around THE ENTIRE ISLAND. I know that Malta is probably half the size of one side of Adelaide but that is completely beside the point. The tour guides and bus drivers were really friendly and all spoke Maltese, English and Italian. Which I would have appreciated more if I spoke either Maltese or Italian.
(Although, one time the tour guide asked this Italian couple to see their tickets and I had to physically restrain myself from jumping up and screaming ‘Hey I understood that!!!’ Miss Pomari would have been proud). The bus driver even drove me to meet Carla, in a different TOWN, just because he had dropped everyone else at their hotels and so why shouldn’t he drop me somewhere?
#6 Thou Shalt Make Terribly Translated Tour Commentary
The only downfall of the tour was the commentary. Unfortunately, the content must have been written in Maltese first and then when it was translated into English a little something got lost along the way…
Regarding the Italian population in Malta:
‘There are many Italians that live on the island and many people speak fluent Italian. A lot of Maltese families take part in Italian culture and often eat pasta more than once a week’
LOL!
#5 Thou Shalt Not Speak Normally But Constantly Shout
If there is such a thing as an official indoor voice (and not something your parents just make up to keep you quite at important family functions) then Malta have not been informed. They don’t mean it an angry way (although you wouldn’t want to make one of them angry to check) they are just very enthusiastic. With almost absolutely everything they say. It was not uncommon to see two men shouting at each other over the road, not about anything, probably just whose turn it was for the weekly poker game or the neighbourhood gossip (obviously I’m just guessing because I don’t understand Maltese – could have been complex Mafia plans for all I know). I’m guessing there was never a successful timid Maltese businessman, he would have been outshouted in no time.
#4 Thou Shalt Drive The Most Craziest Humanely Possible
The Maltese drive on the left side of the road. They give way to the right on roundabouts and they stop at red lights and go at green. Aside from that, I couldn’t find ANY international road rules they did adhere to – they all drive with the intention to get somewhere NOW or die trying. People pull out everywhere and there are constant traffic blockages with people refusing to let other people in, people who are trying their damndest to make them do so. A lot of streets in Malta are only one way one which creates a whole new basket of bees worth of problems. Unfortunately (or fortunately, I haven’t decided yet…) I witnessed a poor man who stalled his car and couldn’t restart it, thus holding up the HUGE line of traffic behind him on a busy one way road. But of course in true Maltese fashion, people all stopped their cars, got out and helped him push it to the curb.
Malta: stopping the traffic chaos for one minute to help a brother in need.
#3 Thou Shalt Make Constant, Plentiful and Very Unnecessary Overuse of A Car Horn
By the end of five days I wanted to curse the man who invented the car horn.
Or bus horn.
Or bike bell.
If there is any obstacle between a Maltese driver (in any form) and where they want to go, they will honk. A lot. So much in fact that when asked what the ambience of Malta sounds like (ok well nobody asked me that but hypothetically) I would say, swishing waves, smiling babies and honking. The Maltese Buses are the worst, they will honk at anything (half the time I swear it was just at thin air) and paired with the crazy driving and buses which are like a million years old – it all makes for an interesting ride!
#2 Thou Shalt Have The Most Amazing Scenery in Europe
Ok so this is a biggie. But I don’t believe in doing things half assed and if you’re going to make the big calls you got to get behind them. I believe Malta is the most beautiful place I have EVER scene.
When I caught a taxi from the airport, we drove through Balluta Bay to get to my hostel and as soon as we turned the corner into the bay I gasped. OUT LOUD. Like someone drowning. Even in the dark I had never seen anything so amazing in my entire life. Over the next five days it only got better, and with each new place I was more and more amazed. I think I took 40 photos of the same views just because I thought the more I took, the better the camera could capture what I was actually seeing in front of me.
And after I put the photos on FB, judging by the 41 notifications I got just on THAT album of 70 photos, other people were amazed too.
#1 Thou Shalt Have The Friendliest People You Will Ever Meet
Anyone who says there is such a thing as a mean spirited native Maltese person is deluded, deranged or lying to make their own country feel better. This small population of people are the kindest people I have ever come across and (as I found out) will do ALMOST anything to help you in times of need. Of course, travelling by myself an unable to consult with travelling partners about any possible trip difficulties, I was doing a lot of asking.
Firstly, there was the taxi man who took me to my hostel. He didn’t really know where to go but got help from the other taxi drivers and soon we were on our way. We arrived and realised that we were indeed quite lost. He stops the car, gets out and talks to this cute little old Maltese man walking past, asking him for directions. Still, we cannot find it. So we call the hostel and he talks to the girl on the phone and figures out where to go. He drives me there, carries my suitcase inside and makes sure that I have everything I need .And then, when I try to tip him he refuses, ‘all part of the job lovely’.
Most taxi drivers would disagree my lovely.
Secondly, when going back to the airport (maybe I just have airport issues), the reception to the hostel was closed and I had no way of calling a taxi and no credit with which to do so. So I go to the little corner shop across the road and ask if they can call one for me. Next thing I know the husband says he will take me – we’re in his car and driving to the airport! I’m sitting with his little daughter in the backseat staring at me constantly (‘What’s your name?????????? she says) and then suddenly we are there. He does accept money but only because I would have forced it on him if he had refused.
Thirdly, there was Carla, Pete’s cousin who took time out of her busy studying-for-exams schedule to come into town and hang with me. Of course she is related to Pete, but for all she know I could have been a psychopath on the lookout for Maltese blood.Well that came out more morbidly than I wanted...
And that friends, is the Ten Commandments of Malta
Was Malta one of the best places I have ever been?
DEFINITELY
Did I already consider putting in a deposit for a nice sea view apartment?
-Condiments (English mayonnaise and ketchup is to die for)
-Retaining the Ashes (much to my dismay)
-Having the most posh and bogan accents simultaneously within the same land mass
However, there is one reasonably important thing the English do not cope with so well: pretty much any form of weather.
The English freak out at:
-Any temperature over 20
-Any more than 7 snow flakes
-Cats and dogs falling from the sky
Ok well perhaps the last one would prove to be concerning for most nations, but be assured the English would certainly reach a whole new level of freaked-out-ness.
In their defence England, and indeed the whole of the UK, has not experienced heavy snow in the past, and has only just been introduced to it in the last couple of years. However, whenever the sky turns a little white and the pretty little snowflakes drift in the air it seems to be some sort of weird Morse code for the whole country to go into complete and utter distress.
The transport systems grind to an absolute halt, which is just amazing if you need to get anywhere, a fairly common goal for thousands of people everyday. Cancellations and delays caused by the snow means train stations and airports are completely clogged with angry and grumpy people who are given no answers and very little assistance.
So you would think that perhaps if the weather was a little warmer the snow wouldn’t be a problem and life in old England town could return to normal?
Oh no I would think again.
As I learnt from one Leeds local, the highest temperature recorded in the summer of 2010 was 25. And they were freaking out. You can just imagine it now: old people were passing out, supermarkets were running low on bottled water and Primark probably sold out of shorts, which is a travesty in itself.
Us Australian’s on the other hand are a race of winners. We don’t like to lose and this can be seen even in the way we approach our weather. Mother Nature has been known to throw some crazy curveballs at our country: we can have raging bushfires and swelling floods at the same time in different parts of the country. The difference between the ocker attitude and the English is that whilst they cower under Mother Nature’s wrath, we get even and are prepared for anything she will throw at us.
A whole country of people who had to put down their stubbies in order to tackle the weather are not the sort of people you want to mess with.
So despite being able to hold their pints, when it comes to coping with any form of SLIGHTLY extreme weather the English get a resounding F. Let’s just hope for the sake of the lovely people of this nation that this global warming thing is all an elaborate hoax and the weather won’t get any worse.
But realistically, that’s not looking good.
Was I surprised at England’s complete lack of preparation for extreme weather?
DEFINITELY
Could the English learn a little from Australia, the land of four seasons in one day?
MAYBE
Will England ever be able to handle any day that’s not 18 with a pleasant northerly breeze?
When you are part of a tour there are three important factors which, when combined, will almost definitely ensure its success.
a)Nice, friendly fellow tour group members
b)A well balanced and varied itinerary
And
c)A really cute guy you can perve at from the backseat
Unfortunately, our PaddyWagon tour of Ireland lacked in the department of the latter, however we also had one aspect that was, almost, better.
The funniest, and craziest tour guide ever.
Introducing Connor:
a.k.a Conrad
a.k.a Captain
a.k.a Capitano
Someone with that amount of names must have to have a similar sized head to match, and that pretty much sums up the crazy Irishman who manoeuvred us around Southern Ireland for three days.
Here are some of the better ‘Connor’ moments that have to be shared, if not for laughs, simply for longevity - these have to be written down for historical comedic purposes.
Connor Moment Number #1:
Connor loved the Aussies.
Whilst it may not appear it at first, or maybe at all, he had a little spot for us in the crazy Irish heart of his. Here are a few of the tender stories he shared with us about the special bond between the Irish and Australians.
‘We have a very strong pub culture in this country boys and girls (be prepared for that a lot, that’s pretty much all he called us even though none of us were five…). The Australians say that they do as well, but ill tell you, you do not have anything like us Irish do. Firstly, when we want a drink we go to the pub. Not you Australians. You drive into a weird garage thing and give a guy some money and he puts beer through your window, which you put in the fridge. When I was in Australia I said to a friend late on a Monday night, ‘let’s go to the pub for a drink’ to which he replied, ‘oh mate I’ve got work tomorrow and its like 10:00pm, just go to the kitchen and get a beer from the fridge’. In Australia you have to make plans to go the pub – ‘Connor we’ll go on Friday night ok, I promise at this time we will go’. In Ireland we got the pub whenever and wherever. In Ireland you have to make plans to go to kitchen to drink – ‘Connor on Friday night we’ll go to the kitchen to drink, I promise at this time we will go’.
Australian’s think you have a pub culture? We Irish think not, and don’t bother trying to come up with a retort for that one boys and girls cause I know you are thinking ‘Connor is right’
And unfortunately, but hilariously, he was.
‘We have a sport here called Gaelic football. And we actually do a tournament versus the Australians with a mixture of rules from their game AFL – it’s called International Rules. However, a lot of Irish folk feel that the Irish have to give up too much for the Australians.
You moan and complain because you have to learn to handle a round ball after the oval one that you use for AFL.
BUT the tackling rules are laid in favour of the Australians – we get our puny little Irishmen put up against your ENORMOUS AFL players, who get pummelled so hard they become part of the playing field. And the Irish argue our game is so much more skilful, whereas in AFL you just smash someone into the ground, step on them, grab the ball and run off.
Now does that sound fair boys and girls?
Connor Moment #2
His one liners
(talking about Irish history)
‘So it is all very interesting, lots of shit went down boys and girls and this made Ireland what it is today’
(leaving Galway on the first night)
‘Good morning boys and girls, hope you had a nice night in County Galway. If you had a big night and are feeling a little seedy this morning you will be happy to know we will be going through some of the windiest and roughest Irish roads pretty much all day!’
(referring to Louise and I)
‘I’ve decided to call you Floozy #1 and Floozy #2. What is a floozy? (we asked) – well if a very nice girl is a 1 and a prostitute is a 10 then a floozy is about a 6’.
Oh nice, thanks Connor!
(referring to Dublin)
‘I like Dublin, the best thing I like about it is the view of it in the rear view mirror. It’s shit’.
Was Connor actually a really good and informative tour guide?
DEFINITELY
Was he trying to hit on some of the tour members?
MAYBE
Will I get sick of hearing him calling us ‘Darling’ in his Irish accent all day?
There were very few things I knew about Ireland before I went there
a)They drink Guinness
b)They play Gaelic footy – the wussy version of the real man’s sport Australian Rules
c)They like to paint everything various shades of green
Whilst all the above may be true, it really doesn’t provide one with the clearest picture of what to expect from the Isle of Green. So where does my Irish tale start you ask?
In Louise’s room at Boddington, being woke up by our alarm at 4:00am…
Arrived at the Leeds Bradford Airport sleepy eyed and groggy (and surprisingly hungry for 5:00 in the morning!). Checked into our flight, ate a hearty breakfast of a chocolate muffin (are you allowed to have chocolate before 6:00am??) and sat waiting for our RyanAir flight to Dublin.
Note: Just to interrupt I feel it is important to say a little spiel about RyanAir. There isn’t really anything like it in Australia – it is a strange European phenomenon. It is a RIDICULOUSLY low cost airline which flies all around Europe. However, these amazingly low prizes do come with certain risks – like you might not actually get wherever it is where you need to go. And yes you may have only paid 5 pounds for your flight but most would say reaching your destination is relatively important….
So we get to the gate and get on the plane (this would be the time you could breathe the sigh of relief with other airlines…oh but not RyanAir) and luckily headed off for Dublin. And – wait for it – arrived in Dublin EARLY! That must have been a RyanAir first and I feeling pretty privileged to be a part of that! They should design commemorative medals for the passengers or something.
I’ll be waiting for it in the mail.
Although we did arrive early in Dublin it really wasn’t to our advantage as it was only just after 7:00am and still completely dark in Dublin. Can’t do much sightseeing in the pitch black.
So Louise and I hung out in the Dublin airport at the bagel stand, making one of our MANY, MANY food stops that we do daily whilst we are travelling, got a map and started to plan our day.
Caught the bus into the city centre and got to our hostel. Not a single person who worked at the Hostel was actually Irish but that was fine they were all very lovely. Bought a ticket to the Hop On and Hop Off Sightseeing Bus and did a full circuit loop around Dublin. Saw all the main sights and everything that is worth seeing in Dublin. Drove through the Main St, past Trinity College, St Patrick’s Cathedral, The Dublin Gaol, The Guinness Storehouse, The Dublin Zoo, and heaps of museums and other churches. Afterwards we picked out the places we wanted to see that day and did a walk through Trinity College (where I saw the most enormous snowball you have ever seen in your life – photographic evidence is available in my Ireland photos). Following this we headed the Dublin Castle. Now the problem with the choice of name for such a building is it really does not portray the true essence of the structure.
Not because it can’t fully describe its beauty.
Not because it can’t instil in you the true sense of its history.
It’s because Dublin Castle looks like NO castle I have ever seen….
Later on, we did read that Dublin Castle was voted as the number one Castle in Europe which ‘least resembles an actual Castle’ and more just looks like every other historical building in the area.
Ripped off.
Having been significantly disappointed by Ireland’s ability to accurately name their Castles we headed to Temple Bar for our first pint of authentic Irish Cider. The Temple Bar area isn’t one specifc pub but more the description of the whole area. It was really quite cool with HEAPS of proper little Irish pubs and cute touristy shops (you know I love my tourist shops!). However, we had been warned by a couple of other well worn travellers that Dublin was a great city, very lively, very Irish but to be careful because (to excuse my French) it will rape your wallet. Up until that moment we had been doing ok, but it was all a façade people! Dublin was just trying to lull us into a false sense of security before it stole every penny we had (or wait that would be cent because it was Euros…).
Went into an Irish Pub and Louise saved our table while I went to the bar.
Ordered two pints of Bulmers.
‘That will be 12 Euros love’
‘Um excuse me what?’
’12 Euros’
‘Right well I’m just going to go and sell Louise’s liver and my first born child and I’ll be back with the money’.
Ok that’s a little exaggerated. But it was SO expensive.
Went for dinner on Grafton St, to Bewley’s Café, a restaurant recommended to Louise by her parents, who had been to Dublin not that long ago. Had some really great food and a waiter with a crazy accent that Louise could not understand. By far the best part of our night though was the entertainment. Luckily for us, there was a choir group of some kind having their Christmas party in the same restaurant – and after dinner and many bottles of wine they sang Christmas Carols for everyone.
You could just feel the Irish love in the air.
The next morning we went shopping, had a surprisingly REALLY good coffee in a seedy looking Irish café and visited the Dublin Writers Museum. Of course anyone who knows me, knows I have a very special relationship with my books but Louise was a good enough friend to tag along – and didn’t once complain she was bored! Visited the gift shop, bought one book and then had to forcibly remove myself at the risk of wanting to buy all of them. Hopped back on the bus and visited the Kilmainham Gaol where some of Ireland’s most famous men and women were held.
That night we had dinner with Alice and Bec our fellow ‘Radadelaiders’ and Alice’s cousin Megan. Stupidly, we headed for Temple Bar again, to find we couldn’t eat at any of the Irish pubs because of their outrageous prices. And besides after yesterday’s cider experience Louise and I only had one liver between us to sell and I don’t think that is medically recommended. So in very un-Irish fashion we ate at the Hard Rock café and drank 5 Euro cocktails.
It was the DUBLIN Hard Rock, surely we get some Irish credit for that???
Monday saw us leave on our 3 Day Southern Ireland Tour. Got introduced to our bus driver, tour guide and local Irish crazy person Connor, a.ka. Conrad, a.k.a Captain and headed off with 20 others West to Galway. Along the way we met Roxy and Jonathon, two fellow Aussies, Brian the bubbly Canadian and Sarah and Kyle, perhaps the only genuinely nice Americans we have met since we have been in England…(too harsh?!?!)
Along the way Connor pointed out various Irishy things, and gave us many a spiel about Irish culture. Some of them were so classic, they deserve an entry of their own so keep your eyes pealed for that.
Drove past Galway, even further West into the wild Connemara region. Stopped at the village of Cong (no, not as it King) and had lunch at a gorgeous little Irish pub. We were the only people in there but the service was amazing, the food was a credit to those fine Irish people. For the rest of the afternoon we drove through the Connenmara which had some of the most spectacular scenery I have seen anywhere. Visited Kylemore Abbey which was this enormous and ornate mansion built into the side of a hill alongside a beautiful lake. Connor told us it was built by an Englishman for his wife.
Now that is the sort of husband id like!
Spent the night in Galway where we ate in Murphy’s (I had VERY traditional Irish lasagne…) and then headed to Taffe’s for some proper Irish music. The little four person band that played there looked like they had been ripped straight from an Irish postcard (and I would know, I have bought so many since I’ve been here!) and the youngest guy played the tin whistle, the spoons and cracked some amazing Riverdance moves.
And to his credit he didn’t even laugh THAT much when Roxy got up in the middle of a completely empty dancefloor and danced around like a looney trying to impersonate his Riverdance and stealing his spoons.
God Bless the Australians – there’s always one…
Tuesday saw us drive South heading for Killarney, along the coast of County Clare. Again, the scenery was breathtaking and SO different from where we had been only a few hours away the day before. Got some great photos overlooking the Atlantic, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky!
Arrived at the Cliffs of Moher and hiked up the way-too-many number of steps to O’Brien’s Tower which overlooks the whole cliffs. Bought, yet MORE souvenirs and got back on the bus.
Spent Tuesday night in Killarney and had a big group dinner at yet another proper Irish pub. Although, at one point they played a terrible Irish cover of ‘Land Downunder’ by Men At Work. Not quite sure whose idea was that but I would suggest in future taking your advice from Michael Flatley and sticking with the Riverdance…
Spent the rest of the night in an Irish ‘club’ (oh dear it was as sad as it sounds) but there was a great cover band on, and once again Roxy kept the ENTIRE tour entertained with her solo interpretations of Irish dancing.The next morning we were introduced to Bill and Patrick who took us on a horse and cart tour through Killarney National Park (Bill was the horse, Patrick the driver in case you were confused…) Luckily the views of the park were amazing, because after sitting in an open aired carriage for an hr in the freezing Irish air you would want it to be worth it!
Drove on from Killarney to Blarney Castle where Brian, Louise and I hiked up the castle to kiss the famous Blarney Stone. Now they say that when you kiss the stone you get given the gift of the Irish gab for seven years. Well the ‘gab’ is something I do not lack so kissing it was either rendered completely obsolete, or I’ve been given an overdose of the talking gene.
Which probably isn’t a good thing for anyone involved. However, I did kiss it and we explored the Castle grounds before heading back to Dublin.
Because a couple of the people on our group were doing the six day tour – they left with Connor to continue on and we hopped on a bus with Shaunie who was taking us back to Dublin. If I thought Connor was a little crazy in his little Irish head, Shaunie is like Glenside personified (sorry if your not from Adelaide and won’t get that!). He was really good fun, but nobody could barely understand a thing he was saying and he lead the bus in an a capella rendition of Backstreet Boys ‘I Want it That Way’.
Need I say anymore.
Headed back home to Leeds with our trusty RyanAir, bags full of kitchy shamrocks and leprechauns (ok well maybe that was just my bag…) and our heads full of Irish tunes.
Was Ireland actually a lot better than I was expecting?
DEFINITELY
Is it a pre requisite for all Irish people to be slightly mental?
MAYBE
Will I ever forget our bus theme tune – The RubberBandits ‘Horse Outside’?
PROBABLY NOT! (and seriously people look it up on YouTube its freaking hilarious!)
The London Underground is an inexplicable phenomenon.
Much like the Northern Lights or a Solar Eclipse, it is confounding, a little puzzling and is running at 100% efficiency only about as often as one can see either of the above.
My experiences with what Londoners refer to the ominous sounding ‘Tube’ (affectionately or otherwise I am yet to ascertain) were mixed and therefore I wanted to flesh out the pros and cons to decide for myself whether the ‘Tube’ (I feel like the Jaws music should accompany the very term) is indeed friend or foe…
Pro Number #1
It’s underground.
This may seem as deadly obvious as the nose on your face but this is often a commonly overlooked MASSIVE pro. By having the whole system underground, commuters do not have to contend with any of the mental London traffic. Also, it doesn’t need to follow the already designated roads and when building in new lines they can pretty much just hack out a tunnel anywhere they want (I’m sure it is more complicated than that but that is why I deal with words and not engineering). This also means you can get somewhere IN THEORY quicker than you could on the roads. Although NASA has said people could live on Mars IN THEORY and you don’t see people rushing off to their local rocket ship….
Also, it is warm underground. Well warmer anyway, but when you are contending with minus one London weather as I was even the slightest increase in temperature is welcomed. Although, on this note, it probably would get a little hot in the summer. But seeing as the English wouldn’t know what a real summer was if it slapped them in the face, I’m guessing this wouldn’t be a real issue.
Con Number #1
It’s underground.
No, I haven’t suffered short term memory loss – the fact the Tube is underground is a negative just as much as it is a positive. I discovered the joys of this con when trying to get to Piccadilly Circus to see Grease on West End.
Got on the train.
My train was fine.
The train in front? Not so fine.
So what do you do when the train in front of yours breaks down?
You guessed it people – absolutely nothing. There is no such thing as a Tube ‘detour’, for the simple reason that there is nowhere to go. So everyone just has to wait on the train until the problem is fixed and the line is free again. Obviously this can cause HUGE backlog problems, big delays and a lot of cramped and angry Londoners. And trust me; they are cramped and angry at the best of time so these sort of situations are not helping.
Pro Number #2
The Oyster Card
I would like to kiss the person who invented the Oyster Card. If only the head of the transport system in Melbourne or Sydney had been there when God handed him the gift of the Oyster Card, then we wouldn’t have some of the most badly organised and run transportation systems in the world. The concept is quite bewilderingly simple.
Put money on Oyster Card.
Swipe Oyster Card.
Get on Train.
Get off Train.
Swipe Oyster Card.
And repeat.
Of course there are other ticketing options, but the idea of buying a ticket for EVERY single leg you to take makes watching paint dry look more appealing. It also is a very efficient system as it means you don’t have to line up for the ticket machines and can just swipe away like the crowds and crowds of local Londoners who are rushing around the Underground at a million miles an hour in their typical uptight English fashion.
Con Number #2
The Oyster Card
Some famous guy once said there are always two sides to the same story. The Oyster Card my friends is no exception. Yes it is efficient and yes it is easy to use but there is one little characteristic of the humble Oyster Card which is often overlooked and is almost always the cause of its downfall.
It is ultimately a piece of technology and what is the one thing we can rely on when it comes to technology boys and girls? It will and does break.
So for example, I loaded my Oyster Card with 10 pounds from a local newsagent and got the station. Moved into the enormous queue of people lining up to swipe their precious Oyster Cards and got the front. Swiped it and lo and behold it didn’t work. Swiped it again. No go. (And of course it has one of those little red lights which just teases you incessantly…’haha I’m not letting you through’.
Just as I was about the try it a third time there was a sharp and angry London voice in my ear:
‘It won’t let you in cause you have no money, now can you please move?’
Well aren’t you just a ray of sunshine….
I of course turned and told her that I had just put on 10 pounds so it did definitely have money on it but nevertheless I backed out of the massing crowd and had to get someone to check my card. They informed me that yes the money was on there but just to try again as they can be a little funny sometimes.
The Oyster Card. Reliable, efficient, but sometimes a little ‘funny’?
Uh huh.
Pro Number #3
The map.
Despite being a crazy labyrinth of colourful lines and tiny little station names in ridiculously small black font – the system is actually quite easy to use. Each station is really well signed and you really would have to be pretty stupid to get on the wrong one. Especially because when you get on they tell you where that particular train is going. So if you were going to get on the wrong train you would have to be really thick or deaf or both and if you fit into any of these categories I do apologise. Even when getting off a train and wanting to transfer to another one, there are plenty of signs and plenty of time to read them with the crowds moving incredibly slowly through the station.
Con Number #3
The dreaded strike.
That one S word is enough to instil fear into the hearts of every Londoner. Unfortunately for me, one of their famous strikes happened to fall on one of the days I found myself in London. And let me tell you it is as annoying and frustrating as it appears.
Having said this, the transport people do actually deal with it the best way they can. At each station there are loads of transport officials who can help you try to get where you need to go if you can’t take the route you normally would. Yes, this is helpful and I was very grateful for it, but if there weren’t SO many lines and stations closed the problem wouldn’t be there in first place. And of course for the strike to have any ACTUAL effect they shut off the lines which are the most central and go through the most stations where people need to go.
People meaning tourists as well.
Gay.
Is a ride on the London Underground a bit of a hit and miss experience?
DEFINITELY
Would something similar work in certain cities in Australia?
MAYBE
Will I EVER stop giggling at the Piccadilly line that terminates at Cockfosters?
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